Roses Are Red Grass Is Green Poems Are Hard Mmmm Wine

When a wanted ad leaps from the laptop screen and smacks you between the eyes because it’s calling for someone to assist with the grass cutting of parks and roadsides and says you must have experience using mowers, whipper snippers and brushcutters, you answer it because you know you’d be the perfect little garden gnome for that job.

Here’s the fun little job rejection reply:- “Sorry, but we are looking for someone who has a few more years mowing experience.”  What the!?!?  Seriously!?!?  Oohh my gawwd…hang on a sec…just let me pick up my jaw off the floor.

Hmmm, so it seems my husband’s time mowing yards as a small boy all the way through to manhood, infinity and beyond gaining hands on experience along the way in the use of mowers, whipper snippers, tractor slashers and everything else in between just wasn’t quite enough experience for that particular person.  Common sense, common sense…where for art thou common sense?  What a fun little lollipop triple dipped in a bowl full of stoooopid that job advertiser was.

Perhaps another 30 years on top of the 35+ years my husband has already chalked up in caring for blades of green grass might put him in a better position for this type of  work in the future…provided of course if his 80+ year old body can still bend over and yank a mower chord without dislocating every bone in his body…or he’s not six foot under and pushing up daises by then.

I’m off to plant my butt in the middle of a freshly cut lawn, drink some vino, chin wag with some friends and think to myself what a wonderful way to spend a Sunday afternoon.  The search for narnia can wait until tomorrow.  Sunday is a day of rest.


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